I could not firgure out how to center this in the message.

Ever wonder in your relationship, how

'the fight' started...:

One year, a husband

decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a
Christmas gift...

The next year, he

didn't buy her a gift.

When she asked him

why, he replied,

"Well, you

still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the

fight started...


---------------------------------------------------------------------


My wife and I are

watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in
bed.

I turned to her

and said,

'Do you want to

have Sex?'

'No,'

she answered.

I then said,

'Is that your

final answer?'

She didn't even

look at me this time, simply saying

'Yes.'

So I said,

'Then I'd like to

phone a friend.'

And that's when

the fight started...

---------------------------------------------------------------------

My wife sat down

on the couch next to me as I was flipping the channels.
She asked,
'What's on TV?'
I said,
'Dust.'
And then the fight

started...

---------------------------------------------------------------------

My wife was

hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary..
She said,

'I want something

shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.'

I bought her a

scale.
And then the fight

started...




----------------------------------------------------------------------------


My wife and I were

sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she
kept staring at a

drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby
table.
I asked her,
'Do you know him?'
'Yes,'
she sighed,
'He's my old

boyfriend... I understand he took to drinking right after we
split up those

many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!'
I said,
'Who would think a

person could go on celebrating that long?'

And then the fight

started...

---------------------------------------------------------------------

I rear-ended a car

this morning... So, there we were alongside the road and
slowly the other

driver got out of his car.

You know how

sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just
seem funny?

Yeah, well I

couldn't believe it... he was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to

my car, looked up at me, and shouted,

'I AM NOT HAPPY!'

So, I looked down

at him and said,

'Well, then which

one are you?'

And then the fight

started....


---------------------------------------------------------------------

THE BROKEN LAWN

MOWER:

When our lawn

mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that
I should get it

fixed.

But, somehow I

always had something else to take care of first, the truck,
the car, playing

golf. Always something more important to me.

Finally she

thought of a clever way to make her point.

When I arrived

home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily
snipping away with

a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a
short time and then

went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when
I came out again I

handed her a toothbrush.

I said, 'When you

finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.'


The doctors say I

will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

Those are some good ones.

lmao on the reunion story Rich.

Here's another......


I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.

"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.

So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

And that's how the fight started....

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first...

"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please..."

He replied, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"

"Nah, she can order for herself."

And that's how the fight started.....

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.

She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds."

I bought her a scale.

And that's how the fight started......